Distracted

Just get it all down on paper, because there may be something great in those sex crazy pages that you would never have gotten to by more rational, grown-up means. -Anne Lamott

Listening to: Here Comes the Sun by The Beatles

Went to my home away from home: “the coffee shop” I basically live there now. So I went in today to try and get some of my short story done, I have only one month left before I send it out to some publishers and journals. Also I wanted to work on some stories for my blog, but the words just weren’t coming to me. And I know exactly why. Oh, I know exactly why I couldn’t write. I was far too distracted.

First things first, I have always been a really shy person, I was shy as a little kid and I’m shy still as an adult. Now I’m not as shy as I was when I was seven, plus I don’t hid behind chairs and older adults but still I get shy. Which seems silly to me, because not only was a communication major for two years, but I’m going to be a teacher and also I do Speech and Debate, which basically means I talk for ten minutes straight in front of a group of people that are there to judge me.

But for the life of me, when I sit next to a very attractive guy, I freeze up, can’t talk, and have no idea for the life of me what to say. Its like I almost forget how to act. And this issue clearly didn’t help me with my writing today. I couldn’t write, I was stuck and far too distracted.

I was just a mess. Talk about writers block….

It wasn’t until he left that I actually started writing, I even waited till now to blog about this. And watch he might even be reading this. hahaha. I mean thats fine, if he is. I just get so damn shy and so nervous. It’s moments like these that make wonder how I even was in a relationship/went on dates. It really makes me wonder.

I’m crushing hard right now and it is not helping with my writing.

Shit.

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